Jesus Freak of the Week #6

This is the first time that I have posted a Jesus Freak athlete. This is surprising because there are a lot of athletes out there who thank god for winning a big game or have "john 3:16" on their eye black.

 These big winners obviously planned the adorable outfits they are so beautifully modeling. I'm honestly glad that these guys belong to Jesus, because if I was the owner of the team I would terminate their contracts before they could run to church and thank jesus for helping them win their big match. Seriously, take some credit, you worked your ass off and won, jesus has nothing to do with it. 

Grow up Peter Pan... Count Chocula...

Jesus Freak of the Week #5

Jesus loves you so stop going to the beach wearing your little bathing suits and having fun. Jimbo and Phyllis here hate it when people show skin and have fun, but wanted to leave a little reminder to everyone that jesus will still love them. I mean look at this lady, she's wearing jeans, a long sleeve shirt and shoes to the beach. Then you look at the guy and he has jean shorts, a cut off shirt and sneakers? Who sticks out? The funniest thing to me is that it looks like these two "all-knowing" jesus lovers don't know how to get this cross into the sand. Do you think god is going to float down and push it into the sand with his giant pinky finger?

Best way to get sand kicked in your face: Bring a giant cross to the beach and tell everyone they are sinners.